Does Anybody Remember Yahoo Serious?

Ok, well to begin with, this doesn't have anything to do with Yahoo serious. It has to do with a memory I just retrieved from Grade 6. But I promise, at the end of the day, when all is said and done and the dust has settled, then..ultimately..after all that..there will be Yahoo Serious.

This is dedicated to my oldest friend Jess.
You are pregnant now. That's weird.
Just sayin'.

Our story takes place in our elementary school portable. The building itself was something of an educational refugee colony, mainly thrown to excess grade 5s and pregnant French teachers. This year, it was Mr McCauliff's Musical Centre of Excellence.

From the very beginning, Mr McCauliff expressed unabashed devotion to the works of Andrew Lloyd Webber and Phil Collins. We set to work immediately on two songs:
- Music of the Night (Lloyd Webber's sweeping gothic melody from The Phantom of the Opera)
- Groovy Kind of Love (Phil Collins. Yes.)

Mr McCauliff was a perfectionist - he demanded that our pubescent voices ring out the haunting lyricism of lines like "When I kiss your lips, ooh I start to shiver/ Cant control the quivering inside" with complete conviction.

Two songs, rehearsed daily for six months. It would be a a coup for Adult Contemporary: leveling the playing field between 11 year olds in slap bracelets and 37 year olds in dickies.

The details of the concert are still shady. I believe there was a ukele showcase (the school prided itself on its well rounded musical programme. Clearly I missed something), and the kindergartens likely sang something shrill and fetching. We, the dauntless Webber/Collinses, dressed in white shirts and black pants, took to the stage. We sang these songs for the last time.

If I squint my mind's eye, I think I can still see the shell shock on my parent's faces.

But now, years later, I believe that Mr McCauliff triumphed after all. On the whole, Grade 6 recitals are unremarkable. At least ours delivered the kind of soulful energy you can only grasp while buying meals for one at Valu Mart.

Next week's caricature of a Music Teacher: Mr. Furta.

And now, as promised - Yahoo Serious.

This Ever Happen to Anyone Else?

It's a little scary. Like asexual reproduction of the Error Message kind.
I tried to make it stop. But it felt some sort of natural imperative to keep procreating.

I forced it to quit. I am top of the food chain.

These Things Brighten My Day

#1: Kool Aid Man

I smile when I think about how many fences died in the making of this ad.



#2: Opening Theme of Rocket Robin Hood

My favourite ever part is where Rocket Robin hood does this little 'hands in the air' bit at :13.

No Thought of Yeats

apprehending underhanded blue jeans
by no means apologetically apoplectic
in the apocalyptic honey festival.

She sold the baby.

Words to the hoards
Walking by signs, metallic in lines
While the wood trees wall to wall, fall
to their living knees.

Stay, please -
It's hot outside, and deranged.

Science is Awesome

Stumbling is also awesome. I came across Carl Zimmer's site of Science Tattoos.
Yes, SCIENCE + TATTOOS ( = Science Tattoos).

Science is the new Rock n Roll. It's dangerous. In your face. Rebellious.
It'll scar your children's flesh and laugh in your face.

But probably the best part of these science tattoos lies in the descriptors. Wicked bad ass science tattoo descriptions make me feel like a wicked dumbass.
Here are two examples:

"Here is a picture of my serotonin tattoo. I don't know that it needs much more explanation than it's my favorite neurotransmitter."--Hayley

And then there's this defiance piece from Jeremy Batten.
This man knows his late Jurassic transitional fossils. No foolin.

"Here is my archaeopteryx, the 'missing link' between birds and reptiles. It comes in handy as a visual tool during debates with creationists that like to visit campus sometimes! Yes, I know structural pigments probably had not evolved by this time..." --Jeremy Batten

A Sorta Calendar

Being in the advertising world, you often forget the real sentiment behind holidays, and focus on the cheaper representational characteristics. In a bid to ground ourselves, my partner Jess and I have devised a way of humbling ourselves over the course of a year.

"Be Like the French. Wear Sexy"

An ad for Simon Perele.


From Ads of the World

Sometimes There's So Much Beauty In the World...

Jessica's comment: "They should have used two breads. Cause the other side looks so lonely, right?"

Some Things That Crazy Man in The Subway Said

"you can give me a ticket, but I'm not payin it"

"I come from Alberta. And there'n steak and oil. BUT NONE FOR YOU, ARSEHOLE"

"When you wear boots, you got those boots on. And you they're made for walking. And boots are... WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT?"

Sheep Terror

Nothing Says "I love you" Like Blatant Racism

All I can say is: "oy".

Advertising Snarkfest

Me to Freddy: "I love Diamond Shreddies. It's hilarious. It's brilliant."
Freddy to Me: "It's Stupid."
Me to Freddy: "Your face is stupid. Put it on your blog"
Freddy to Me: "No, it's stupid."
Me to Freddy: (knowing he loves the whopper freakout and wanting to be a contrarian)
"The Whopper freakout is stupid."
Freddy to Me: "Whopper freakout is brilliant. I'll make you a bet. If we have reviews this week, I'll post diamond shreddies on my blog. If we don't, you post whopper freakout."
Me to Freddy: "Agreed."

And yes, we had our reviews. And now I too will post a Diamond Shreddies item on my blog. And I will also post Whopper Freakout. Because I am a good sport.

Diamond Shreddies:



Whopper Freakout: