Showoff

There are some new pieces of information that make your life better.
Today I discovered the seeing eye horse - miniature ponies that are trained in the same capacity of seeing eye dogs.

I realized that if they trained Aye-Ayes in a similar way, they'd be called Seeing Eye Aye-Aye. Similarly, if I got trained to help the blind, I'd be a Seeing Eye Lei.
Or, if they trained one of the McDonald's mascots, they'd be Seeing Eye Fry Guys.




Go here if you want one: http://www.guidehorse.org/

Skellies!

In 1940, British colonial officer Gerald Gallagher found a human skeleton and a sextant box under a tree on Gardner Island, a coral atoll in the western Pacific. Colonial authorities took detailed measurements, and in 1998 forensic anthropologists judged that the skeleton had belonged to a "tall white female of northern European ancestry."

It may have been Amelia Earhart.

Still Hallowe'en Week? Check.

Ok, so given that I haven't written or done much of anything at all in the past..oh...4 months, I figure going hog wild on ridiculous costume ideas this week is the most easy, accessible and entertaining way to win back readership.

Today's selection: Costume wearers I'd never trust around young children.

We have everything from the drooling cycloptic patio umbrella...


To Roald Dahl throwback with a transsexual haircut Pederast


To the I'm-probably-56-years-old-and-male-under-here situation


The "Ok now we're really calling the cops. This is the third time we've seen him in the playground this week" (he's new!)


The rotting husk of a wax museum obsessed serial rapist.
So..just...no. Really, really, really just no to this guy as a babysitter.

Silence of the Lamb

Self explanatory.
Although if I could have a theme song chasing me around, it might well be this one.

Hallowe'en Costume Ideas

Sometimes people turn to the web for fun costume ideas.
I turn to the web...and more innocent times.






Note on this last one: if the two false faced clowns didn't do it for you, how about the Oil Derrick children?
There will be blood indeed.

See more here

Unabsurd for a Change

..likely to be followed by a post that is absurd. I lay awake in bed last night thinking about how I live for stories. The stranger the way stories are manifested, the greater the thrill. McSweeneys is excellent for that. If you don't know them, you should. Their publications are packaged as delightfully as the baby smooth prose they house.

I came across this page.
Who knew that spinal columns could be so tasty?

When the warm weather has gasped its last, I'm going to screw with some libraries.

Herewith, a new way of reading:





Go to this place for more spinal chills.